Today is June 6th, 2019, meaning it was 13 years ago that I was sitting in the doctor’s office, being told the three words that no one should have to hear, “You have cancer.”
I cannot believe that it has been 13 years since that whirlwind of a day. I remember it like it was yesterday. I remember I had to miss my 1st and 2nd period class, and that I was wearing my favorite teal graphic tee with a My Little Pony on it, and I had on my favorite velcro strapped vans. I remember going back to school after that doctor visit, knowing I was NOT the same as ANY kid at that school from that moment forward. I was in a cloud or fog, feeling like I was not really me. I watched the kids pass by me, chatting about the lunch and prom and stupid gossip, as I was just told I had cancer, and that is all I knew. I had SO many questions racing in my brain. SO much confusion, worry, and concern. I would do anything to go back 13 years and give that girl a hug hug, and tell her it will all be okay.
My dream is for the future is that no one has to ever feel that way about a cancer diagnosis. I don’t want anyone to fear that they are going to die, or feel stressed because they don’t have answers, or feel like they are impaired or disabled or unable to achieve great things because they are” less-than” or “sick.”
I hope we get to the day when we can say it’s “just cancer.” I’ve had it for so long now…. (This thyroid cancer for 5 years and counting….) that I refer to it as just that.
I am not in fear of it. Sure- it changed my outlook and made me discover that life is fragile and precious and all that mumbo jumbo….. But on a day to day, I live quite a normal life. It’s my friend. My annoying friend that I feed veggies and give love to, and kindly tell it- “So yeah… I know you are taking your sweet time here, but this is not your home! You’ve kinda overstayed your welcome!”
I have a new obsession with Grey’s Anatomy… and I cannot help but laugh every time they give a cancer diagnosis to a patient. The music gets all dramatic and sad, and their eyes well up with tears, and then they say “It’s cancer.” They give it power. They dramaticize it. They make it equal death.
Don’t get me wrong, cancer is no walk in the park. It sucks. But we as a culture need to stop making it into a “Your Life Is OVER” diagnosis.
This recent journey to healing (#ProjectGetToZero) has really opened my eyes to a new ways to healing. There are SO MANY ways to heal and recover from cancer. So many less toxic and extreme things to be done. I hope to join the wave of so many non-coventional nutritional experts, coaches, and practitioners that believe in this integrative and holistic way of healing. So that some day… we can say, “Okay… yeah… it’s just cancer.”
Here’s to year 13! I have so much gratitude for this life I live and all the beautiful humans who have helped me along the way.
All my love,