This is my class from a few weeks ago. I am so thankful to have a home here at Brickhouse NYC to explore and do what I do. 🙌🏼💛 • Also, these dancers killed it. (Natalie, Quinn, Michelle, Lauryn, and Dana!)

This piece is inspired by a recurring nightmare I had during my chemotherapy years ago. It went like this-- I was up at bat playing a game of baseball, and the ball machine thing would spit baseballs out at me one at a time. Then, it would shoot the balls out faster and faster and faster. I had no time to recover, prepare, reset, think... I was trying to stand up, but I kept falling over, just getting smacked, slammed and bruised all over my body. We can all relate to not keeping up, whether it be work, our career, our family, our health... well, that's what this piece it about. How we handle times of intense distress and chaos in our lives....

#showmelove #findlove #dowhatyoulove #icantkeepup

Illness is not something to feel ashamed of. It is not a sign of misfortune or defeat. Suffering is the fuel of wisdom, and it opens the way to happiness. Through illness, human beings can gain insight into the meaning of life, understand its value and dignity, and strive to lead more fulfilling lives.

Let me begin to tell you how last minute this was. Jon and I were both tentatively free on a Wednesday. We were going back and forth for about a week, looking at our schedules, debating as to whether or not it would even be feasible to rehearse, stage, and film something all in the same day. Tuesday night came sooner than expected, and we worked to connect the dots, booking the amazing Kyle Breen for videography, using studio space in NJ (because our gym in Astoria sadly closed down), and booking space in the beautiful Alchemical.

12:30pm | Jon and I started rehearsing. Both of us had already forgotten the first step. I remember giving Jon an "uh oh" look and thinking to myself... I cannot believe we are going to be filming this tonight.

3:30pm | Rehearsal in NJ finished, we drove back to New York.

5:45pm | Grabbed food. Looked at our clothes and picked out what we wanted to wear for the shoot.

6:15pm | On the subway, where Jon always be instagram-story-ing... 

Jon, Kyle, and I at the end of the shoot!

7:00pm | Arrived at the venue to find that there was GIGANTIC water leak in the space. -_-  The wood panels on the floor were lifted up and bending all sorts of crazy ways... so we had to then reblock and adjust the movement to fit diagonally and in the corner in the room. Lucky for us, there were these mirrors in the space we could use, so we arranged them to form a wall with actually ended up looking INSANELY beautiful.

8:45pm | We experimented with freestyling at the end. FYI - we did NOT talk out or plan where to go or what to do. It was a "Press Play & Go!!" type of situation.

9:00pm | That's a wrap!

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It was a day full of experimenting, adjusting, professionalism, making it work, thinking on our toes, exercising grit, and sharing our magic. Shout out to Broken Luxury for creating such beautiful music to dance to. Thank you, Jon, for trusting in me. Thank you, Kyle, for going with the flow and capturing the magic! And lastly, thank YOU for reading all of this nonsense and for watching! I hope you enjoy our creation. Share share share!

Thank you, Natalie Zisa, for sharing my story!

>> Link to article

“People deserve to be healthy. I believe that if you have your health, you have everything. It’s the way of giving society equal opportunity.”

— Brianna Mercado

I had an meeting at 8:40 AM with my doctor this morning. In a nut shell, my thyroid cancer is continuing to grow.

My doctor tracks my cancer growth by testing the level of thyroglobulin, which is a protein produced by the follicular cells of the thyroid. My thyroid was surgically removed 3 years ago, so they are using thyroglobulin to track the evil, mutated, cancerous thyroid cells that don't want to behave. Like... REALLY. The 204 millicuries dose of radioactive iodine + my 2 surgeries should have ZAPPED ALL those suckers out! But alas.... they are still hanging around.

Simply put, the more thyroglobulin in my blood, the more cancer I have.

I've been in a battle with this cancer since the summer of 2014, and might I say, my cancer and I have been on quite a roller coaster together. In the past 2 years, my thyroglobulin has gone from:

13.4 ng/mL (WOAHHHH NOT GOOD!!!),
to 2.7 ng/mL (WOOOHOOO, SO MUCH CLOSER TO ZERO!!),
to 1.8 ng/mL (YAYYYYY! EVEN CLOSER TO ZERO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!),
to 2.4 ng/mL (OKAY.. I see you. Slight increase...),

And now, it is at 3.3 ng/mL (HOLD UP... WHY YOU GOING UP?!)

This increasing trend has concerned my doctor a little, so she has ordered that I get a PET scan. Our hope is that something shows up on the scan so we can TREAT IT. It might mean more surgery. It might mean more radiation. It might even mean nothing. Literally, I might just need to be patient and wait another 6 months to analyze the next blood test results. Unfortunately, I have a very rare and aggressive form of thyroid cancer (Google: "poorly differentiated thyroid cancer" at your own risk... haha), and it usually has a liking to spread... soooo.... I need to make sure I stay on top of all my testing and make sure this thing knows who's in charge.

In the meantime, I am fervorously researching ALL my health insurance plan options, as I am aging out of my insurance plan VERY soon and need to find a way to STAY insured and continue my care at Memorial Sloan Kettering. *GULP*

Send positive vibes to the universe as I move forward to figure this of all out...